Master Mind...... :P :P :P
Friday 20 September 2013
Thursday 19 September 2013
Santa ko ek party ka invitation mila jisme likha
tha only pink tie.
Santa wahan gaya to usne dekha ke logo ne pant
shirt bhi pehni
thi.. :P
Santa ka sir phat gya.
Dr. : Ye kaise hua.?
Santa : Main chappal se pathar tod raha tha.
Mujhe 1 aadmi ne bola "Kabhi khopdi" ka
istemal bhi kar liya kar.
Santa ne 1 raah chalti ajnabi ladki se kaha :
Aapne pehchana mujhe ko.
Ladki : Nahi aap koun ho..?
Santa : Main wahi hu jisko aapne parso bhi nahi
pehchana tha.
===================================
Santa math ke paper me dance kar raha tha.
Kisi ne pocha ye kya kar rahe ho..?
Santa : Yaar mere sir ne kaha tha ke har step ke
no. hote hai.
===================================
santa's wife wrote a msg. to Santa :
Ghar kab aa rahe ho. msg. karke batao.
Santa sent msg. to her : Nahi bata sakta msg.
free nahi hai.
===================================
Santa ki G.F. romantic mood me :
Aaj mere ghar koi nahi hai, aa jao.
Santa : Pagal tu mere ghar aaja,
yahan hum saare hai, tera dil lag jayga.
===================================
Santa office ja raha tha,
Patni pyaar se boli :See u in the evening.
Santa gusse se :Dhamki kise de rahi hai, main
bhi tujhe dekh
loonga.
===================================
Santa kisi ladki ke ghar rista le kar gaya ladki ke
maa baap
bole humari beti abhi padh rahi hai.
Santa : Koi baat nahi hum 1 ghante baad aa
jayenge.
===================================
Santa ki beti : Papa kal aapke ghar se 1 member
kam ho jaega.
Next day Santa ki beti bhag jati h.
Santa : Ladki ne kaam to galat kiya per thi wo
jyotish.
===================================
Santa air hostess se :
Aapki shakal meri biwi se bahut milti hai.
Air hostess ne zordar thappad santa ke muh pe
mara.
Santa : Kamal h. Aadat bhi wahi hahi.
===================================
Santa ne evrest pe dekha waha pe 1 baba gutka
ragad raha tha.
Santa : Baba ye kya hai.
Baba : Masala.
Santa : Oh to Evrest masala aap hi banate ho.
tha only pink tie.
Santa wahan gaya to usne dekha ke logo ne pant
shirt bhi pehni
thi.. :P
Santa ka sir phat gya.
Dr. : Ye kaise hua.?
Santa : Main chappal se pathar tod raha tha.
Mujhe 1 aadmi ne bola "Kabhi khopdi" ka
istemal bhi kar liya kar.
Santa ne 1 raah chalti ajnabi ladki se kaha :
Aapne pehchana mujhe ko.
Ladki : Nahi aap koun ho..?
Santa : Main wahi hu jisko aapne parso bhi nahi
pehchana tha.
===================================
Santa math ke paper me dance kar raha tha.
Kisi ne pocha ye kya kar rahe ho..?
Santa : Yaar mere sir ne kaha tha ke har step ke
no. hote hai.
===================================
santa's wife wrote a msg. to Santa :
Ghar kab aa rahe ho. msg. karke batao.
Santa sent msg. to her : Nahi bata sakta msg.
free nahi hai.
===================================
Santa ki G.F. romantic mood me :
Aaj mere ghar koi nahi hai, aa jao.
Santa : Pagal tu mere ghar aaja,
yahan hum saare hai, tera dil lag jayga.
===================================
Santa office ja raha tha,
Patni pyaar se boli :See u in the evening.
Santa gusse se :Dhamki kise de rahi hai, main
bhi tujhe dekh
loonga.
===================================
Santa kisi ladki ke ghar rista le kar gaya ladki ke
maa baap
bole humari beti abhi padh rahi hai.
Santa : Koi baat nahi hum 1 ghante baad aa
jayenge.
===================================
Santa ki beti : Papa kal aapke ghar se 1 member
kam ho jaega.
Next day Santa ki beti bhag jati h.
Santa : Ladki ne kaam to galat kiya per thi wo
jyotish.
===================================
Santa air hostess se :
Aapki shakal meri biwi se bahut milti hai.
Air hostess ne zordar thappad santa ke muh pe
mara.
Santa : Kamal h. Aadat bhi wahi hahi.
===================================
Santa ne evrest pe dekha waha pe 1 baba gutka
ragad raha tha.
Santa : Baba ye kya hai.
Baba : Masala.
Santa : Oh to Evrest masala aap hi banate ho.
Wonderful confession by a girl
and
amazing reply she got :
.
.
She : dad I m in love with a boy who is
far away from me.
I m in india and he lives in uk.
We met on matrimonial
website,
Became friends on fb, Had long chats on whatsapp,
Proposed each other on skype,
&
now 2 months of relationship
through
viber, I need ur blessings and good
wishes ''oh
daddy',
.
Her dad said :
.
.
Now get married on twitter,
Have fun on tango,
Buy your kids from ebay,
Send them through gmail,
And if u r fed up with ur husband.
OLX " pe bech de "!!! :P :P
and
amazing reply she got :
.
.
She : dad I m in love with a boy who is
far away from me.
I m in india and he lives in uk.
We met on matrimonial
website,
Became friends on fb, Had long chats on whatsapp,
Proposed each other on skype,
&
now 2 months of relationship
through
viber, I need ur blessings and good
wishes ''oh
daddy',
.
Her dad said :
.
.
Now get married on twitter,
Have fun on tango,
Buy your kids from ebay,
Send them through gmail,
And if u r fed up with ur husband.
OLX " pe bech de "!!! :P :P
Wednesday 18 September 2013
Wife makes a phone call 2 husband at work & says:"The window is jammed. Wht shud I do?"
Husband replied:
"Pour sum warm water on it, but make sure its not too hot otherwise it will crack" "OK" she replied
10 minutes later he asked:Did u do the trick?
"yes! but.. "The LAPTOP isn't working at all now!"..:P:P
Husband replied:
"Pour sum warm water on it, but make sure its not too hot otherwise it will crack" "OK" she replied
10 minutes later he asked:Did u do the trick?
"yes! but.. "The LAPTOP isn't working at all now!"..:P:P
An Angry Wife!
An angry wife to her husband on phone.
Wife: Where the hell are you ?
Husband: Honey, you remember that gold shop where you saw the diamond necklace & totally fell in love with it ?
Wife (relaxed) : Yes, my dear!
Husband: Remember I had no cash to buy it for you that day and I said I will buy it for you one day ?
Wife (totally relaxed with a smile & a blush) : Yes I remember my love!
Husband: Good, I am in a beer parlour next to that shop!?
An angry wife to her husband on phone.
Wife: Where the hell are you ?
Husband: Honey, you remember that gold shop where you saw the diamond necklace & totally fell in love with it ?
Wife (relaxed) : Yes, my dear!
Husband: Remember I had no cash to buy it for you that day and I said I will buy it for you one day ?
Wife (totally relaxed with a smile & a blush) : Yes I remember my love!
Husband: Good, I am in a beer parlour next to that shop!?
Awesome Conversation between God And a Man. Read it and don’t forget to share it with your friends.
Man: God, can I ask You a question?
God: Sure
Man: Promise You won’t get mad …
God: I promise
Man: Why did You let so much stuff happen to me today?
God: What do u mean?
Man: Well, I woke up late
God: Yes
Man: My car took forever to start
God: Okay
Man: at lunch they made my sandwich wrong & I had to wait
God: Huummm
Man: On the way home, my phone went DEAD, just as I picked up a call
God: All right
Man: And on top of it all off, when I got home ~I just want to soak my feet in my new foot massager & relax. BUT it wouldn’t work!!! Nothing went right today! Why did You do that?
God: Let me see, the death angel was at your bed this morning & I had to send one of My Angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that
Man (humbled): OH
GOD: I didn’t let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that would have hit you if you were on the road.
Man: (ashamed)
God: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick & I didn’t want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn’t afford to miss work.
Man (embarrassed): Okay
God: Your phone went dead bcuz the person that was calling was going to give false witness about what you said on that call, I didn’t even let you talk to them so you would be covered.
Man (softly): I see God
God: Oh and that foot massager, it had a shortage that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn’t think you wanted to be in the dark.
Man: I’m Sorry God
God: Don’t be sorry, just learn to Trust Me…. in All things , the Good & the bad.
Man: I will trust You.
God: And don’t doubt that My plan for your day is Always Better than your plan.
Man: I won’t God. And let me just tell you God, Thank You for Everything today.
God: You’re welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I Love looking after My Children…
REPOST if you believe in GOD
Why Do we feel sleepy in Prayer,
But stay awake through a 3 hour movie?
Why are we so bored when we look at the HOLY BOOK,
But find it easy to read other books?
Why is it so easy to ignore a msg about God,
Yet we forward the nasty ones?
Why are Prayers getting smaller,
But bars and clubs are expanding?
Why is it so easy to worship a celebrity,
But very difficult to engage with God?
Think about it, are you going to forward this?
Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you will get laughed at?
Forward this to all your friends.
80% of you won't forward this.
God said:
If you deny me in front of your
friends, I will deny you on the day of judgment:
When one door closes , God opens two : If God has opened doors for you,
send this message to everyone
including me....
God has no BLACKBERRY but he's my favorite contact ... !!
He is not on FACEBOOK but he is my best friend .... !!
He is not on TWITTER but I still follow him .... !!
& even without the INTERNET I am always connected to him .....!!
He is not on WHATSAPP but he's always online .....!!
Forward this
if God's been good to you....
Man: God, can I ask You a question?
God: Sure
Man: Promise You won’t get mad …
God: I promise
Man: Why did You let so much stuff happen to me today?
God: What do u mean?
Man: Well, I woke up late
God: Yes
Man: My car took forever to start
God: Okay
Man: at lunch they made my sandwich wrong & I had to wait
God: Huummm
Man: On the way home, my phone went DEAD, just as I picked up a call
God: All right
Man: And on top of it all off, when I got home ~I just want to soak my feet in my new foot massager & relax. BUT it wouldn’t work!!! Nothing went right today! Why did You do that?
God: Let me see, the death angel was at your bed this morning & I had to send one of My Angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that
Man (humbled): OH
GOD: I didn’t let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that would have hit you if you were on the road.
Man: (ashamed)
God: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick & I didn’t want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn’t afford to miss work.
Man (embarrassed): Okay
God: Your phone went dead bcuz the person that was calling was going to give false witness about what you said on that call, I didn’t even let you talk to them so you would be covered.
Man (softly): I see God
God: Oh and that foot massager, it had a shortage that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn’t think you wanted to be in the dark.
Man: I’m Sorry God
God: Don’t be sorry, just learn to Trust Me…. in All things , the Good & the bad.
Man: I will trust You.
God: And don’t doubt that My plan for your day is Always Better than your plan.
Man: I won’t God. And let me just tell you God, Thank You for Everything today.
God: You’re welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I Love looking after My Children…
REPOST if you believe in GOD
Why Do we feel sleepy in Prayer,
But stay awake through a 3 hour movie?
Why are we so bored when we look at the HOLY BOOK,
But find it easy to read other books?
Why is it so easy to ignore a msg about God,
Yet we forward the nasty ones?
Why are Prayers getting smaller,
But bars and clubs are expanding?
Why is it so easy to worship a celebrity,
But very difficult to engage with God?
Think about it, are you going to forward this?
Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you will get laughed at?
Forward this to all your friends.
80% of you won't forward this.
God said:
If you deny me in front of your
friends, I will deny you on the day of judgment:
When one door closes , God opens two : If God has opened doors for you,
send this message to everyone
including me....
God has no BLACKBERRY but he's my favorite contact ... !!
He is not on FACEBOOK but he is my best friend .... !!
He is not on TWITTER but I still follow him .... !!
& even without the INTERNET I am always connected to him .....!!
He is not on WHATSAPP but he's always online .....!!
Forward this
if God's been good to you....
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